


Church Bells

by fmpsimon



Series: Sensation [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Drabble, F/M, Mental Illness, Sad, Schizophrenia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-21
Updated: 2016-10-21
Packaged: 2018-08-23 18:57:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8338999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fmpsimon/pseuds/fmpsimon
Summary: Her voice was like music, and he just wanted to hear it again. Modern AU





	

            Whenever she made a sound, it always came out like music.  And not just any old music.  Not some screechy metal or whiny emo band.  It was beautiful and pure, like church bells on Christmas morning.  She couldn't hear it.  When he told her about it (which he did almost every day), she would just laugh, which he would insist was even _more_ musical.

            "You're crazy," she said.

            "Yeah?" he replied, sliding his arm around her waist.  "Crazy in love," he teased.  She rolled her eyes at him, putting on a serious expression.  He pulled her close and buried his face in her neck, tickling her with his stubble and quick kisses.

Her laughter rang out like bells again and he didn't want to stop, because he loved the sound of it so.  She squirmed, trying to escape his hold.  "Jean," she groaned, lightly punching his arms.  "The next punch is going to hurt," she warned.  He withdrew immediately and she smirked.  "I knew that would do it."  He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the nape of her neck.  "I love you," she said softly.

            It didn't faze him that this was the first time she'd ever said that to him.  He just replied automatically, "I love you too."  To say it was automatic wasn't exactly true.  He had thought it over and over again.  It was the response to nearly everything she said, from the groggy "good mornings" to the sleepy "goodnights" whispered over the phone.

            Times like these made the others harder to deal with.  The times when she was down, she just wasn't herself.  Or...she wasn't the girl that he knew.  When she first got sick, she begged him to go to church with her.  He didn't care--he just wanted her to be happy.  And he would have done anything to make her happy and ease her pain.  So, for several weeks, every Sunday, they went to church together.  When she apologized for making him go, he told her he didn't mind.  He liked the sound of the bells.  He told her they reminded him of her voice.  Then he would kiss her, and she would laugh her musical laugh, and they forgot for a moment that she was sick.

            But she was up today, sitting in the sun, reading a book that she had read a hundred times.  "Maybe we should go to church tomorrow," he said.  They hadn't been for a long time and he kind of missed it.

            She glanced up from her book, thinking it over.  "Okay.  It _has_ been a while."  He smiled, satisfied, and she went back to her reading.

            The next morning, she refused to get out of bed.  She said she was tired.  She didn't _want_ to go anywhere.  He didn't argue with her.  That was pointless.  He quietly asked if she needed anything (she didn't), and got dressed.  "I love you, Mikasa," he said softly, before leaving the room.  He threw on his jacket and pulled on his shoes.  When he left the apartment, he didn't really know where he was going, but his feet certainly had plans.  He stopped outside the church, and stared up at the steeple.  The bells were ringing.  He checked his watch.  Yes, the service would be starting any minute now, but he wasn't going in.  He leaned against the retaining wall, put his hand over his face, and cried.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry, this took a turn. I even tried to rewrite it to get rid of the sad bit, but that's where the story wanted to go.


End file.
